Sunday, September 28, 2008

Friendship - in its FULL Essence

Di ba friendship is the most basic form of relationship? Parang most of the relationship is patterned from friendship. Sa mag-ina o mag-ama dapat may respect. Sa magkapatid, dapat may understanding to avoid fights. Even with the professor-student relationship, dapat you know each other’s boundaries. Sa mag-jowa, most basic, dapat may love. Pero the most common thing na dapat all of these relationships,just like friendship, should have – it should be a 2-way thing. Yes, there may be times that both of you should go the same way if the other one needs you. But if your friend needs you, hindi naman cia obligation pero you should be able to adjust din and try to go your friend’s way.

I feel bad when people tend to say you have no obligations to your friends (coz I’m more bias when it comes to my friends) kse prng nagiging less priority ang friendship pag sumingit na ang other types of relationship. Just becoz you have more obligation to be with your gf for example. Well in fact, wala naman kau kasulatan na kapag naging Gf mo cia you should prioritize her more than your friends. Ang kasulatan nyo lng naman ng parents nyo is your birth cert na wala namang na-state na you have an obligation to them. JUST LIKE FRIENDSHIP, gets? So bakit less priority ang friends?

Another common thing, just like in a romantic relationship, there’s always someone na mas into the friendship than the other. Di ba they always say na you love your partner better than your partner does or the other way around. Same as friendship, may mga taong super andyan when you need them, in good times and bad times but the other friend tend to just be there on good times (paminsan lang pag bad). Which is, I dunno, might be tiring for the friend who is most of the time doing the effort?

Can friends be jealous? I usually do, possessive ako sa friends. Mas possessive pa nga ata ako sa friends kesa sa jowa e. Of course, there are levels naman. Pro same as other relationships, jealousy is a demonstration of love. Yung fear na if your friend gets along with other people bka ma-take for granted ka na nya, things like that. And jealousy SHOULD NOT be misinterpreted always na nagf-fall na ung friend mo sau. Most of the time, it’s the attention and, as I said just few sentences ago, fear.

Have you felt abused or used by a friend? I did felt before. Akala ko nagiging friendly lang cia sa kin dahil I was able to understand ung problema nya and nakaka-help ako sa kanya. Well, there are friends naman talaga na ganun. It’s up to you kung how you react and you better gauge things correctly baka namimis interpret mo lang. This goes back to my point sa 2nd paragraph.

Selfish and selfless. Mahirap maging friends yang dalawang yan. May mang gagago at may magpapakatanga. It will end up na either or both e masasaktan. Much better kung minsan ung friend A is selfish and friend B is selfless tpos next time si friend A naman ang selfless at si friend B ang selfish. Pro hindi pa rin. Dapat both are selfless. Para walang (go back to paragraph 5).

And like any other types of relationship, pride should not go each other’s way especially during fights. No one should sleep na may galit sa friend. I honestly can’t sleep pag alam kong galit sa kin ung friend ko or galit ako sa friend ko o nag away kmi. Confrontational akong tao e. Coz most of the time you get to know your friend more when you’re fighting (as I always say, just like other relationships). And you get to fix things on the same day. But try to confront when the tension subsides na. And try to have an open mind so you could understand your friend and why naging ganun ung reaction nya or nasabi nya or whatever. And don’t forget to say sorry kahit hindi ikaw ung may kasalanan (of course kung ikaw naman tlga dapat ka magsorry) and try to tell your friend why you’re saying sorry. Sorry is synonym to please – it is a magic word. Difference lang, please makes something done, Sorry makes all mistakes undone.

Ang point ko lang with all that I have said is that friends are all those people that care for you (your parents, your sister, your brother, your boss, your partner) and those that you consider as friends should be treated the same way as everyone else. Walang, "friend ko lang naman yan", or "wala naman kaming relasyon", or "andyan lang naman cia e". The worst thing you could ever do to a friend is to disregard him dahil hindi mo cia kailangan and acknowledge him pag problemado ka. Spell Karma. I treasure my friends and they fill my bottle first before everyone else becoz I consider everyone important to me as my friends.

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